Hi everyone,
I wanna kinda post an entry early in the day, because I plan on meeting someone later in the evening. Also, because I have B&P'ed not too long ago. About an hour ago. A bottle of orange juice, 4 donuts, a breakfast sandwich, 4 peices of fried chicken and 2 sugar-free jellos. The watermelon jello is so delicious. Anyways, got rid of all that and popped a diet, calcium and diurex pills. Haven't been dieting, which I feel guilty over. Just food entering in my belly and out. The scale said 108 earlier this morning.

I'm back. Not too much to say today, but I'm buying my brother his first tattoo tomorrow. That'll be fun to watch. I already have one, so I know what's to come. The scale hasn't really moved much. It did rotate to 108.7 for a minute, but I had to digest something. I have been binging and purging on and off for the past month now. I almost passed out at my job last saturday. I couldn't see anything, and I could barely hear anything. It was like a faint ringing noise in my ear. I couldn't even walk straight. Totally incoherent. So today, I bought some calcium and B-12 vitamins. Plus, I'll be drinking more water (and taking my diurex) and getting 6 or more hours of sleep a day. Try to take better care of myself. I bought cucumbers and diced tomatoes today to make a small salad whenever I get hungry, but I just B&P'ed like 90 minutes ago, so I'm not really that hungry. I saw 'Make me a supermodel' yesterday, and it seems really interesting. Uh, today I'm 110 pounds. I want to get to 105 pounds. I can fit into a 3/4 currently. Still wanna squeeze into a comfortable size 3. So instead of throwing up my food, I wanna start digesting low calorie fruits and vegetables. I think I can stay on track if I don't consume anymore than 1100-1200 calories a day. Let's wait and see. 5 more pounds to go.

Happy New Year, everyone!

I am a bit ashamed at the fact that I haven't written a post in almost a month. Ah well. Let me update for you guys. Currently I am 5'8, and 110 lbs. I have managed to reach not only my first weight loss goal, but also my second. My first goal was to get to 115lbs. Beat that. Then, my second goal was 111lbs...beat that by a pound. The scale early this morning said 110.0lbs. Wow! How I did it? No diet. Unfortunetly, just binging and purging. I have spent almost $300 in less than 2.5 weeks on my rampages. I am so upset with myself. I said that this year is going to be different. I have to stay more focused on losing weight the right way. My body is starting to look sick. My ribs are showing from the sides of my body, and I can see my spine by standing straight up tall. I can't even tell you guys the pain that heart burn, stomach acid and acid reflux has caused me over these past couple of weeks. Horrible. This isn't the right way to go. I posted an account to thedailyplate.com, and it said I should stick to a caloric intake of little less than 1,200 cals a day to lose 2 pounds in a week. (along with moderate exercise)
That fear is starting to sprout. If I eat anything over 700 calories a day, am I going to start gaining weight? I dunno, a little scared to find out. But I can't keep vomiting. I can't choose this as a lifestyle. Plus, I want to eat. I want to digest something healthy, and not feel guilty as a result later. I have been exercising regularly, and I bought (and fit comfortably) 3 pairs of 3/4 jeans. If anything, I would said that I want to lose 5 more pounds to fit nicely in a pair of size 3 jeans. I kinda have my eye on 105lbs. If anything, I would say that is my next goal. Good luck with everything.

Ok, I haven't posted an entry in like...a week. Crazy. Life has been a little off balance lately. I have managed to lose weight since my last post, but it hasn't been because of diets. I have been binging and purging since. I have not digested a meal since close to my last diet. I believe I was 123lbs since then. I am now down to 119lbs. I'm so close to my goal. I have never been down to 115lbs before. My lowest weight has been 117lbs since earlier this year. Well, today I have been eating 'The Hollywood Diet Cookies'. My dinner will be 2 bags of .25 cent white cheddar popcorn. 120 calories a bag. So 240 calories for dinner. Each of those cookies are 150 cals each. I'll be consuming little less than 900 calories in the next 2 days. I can't quit now. I am so close to my goal. I can't quit.

For the past 3-4 days, I've been feeling my appetite start to dissolve. Lately, I've been eating meals 19-22 hours apart. When I would think about food, I'd kinda say things in my head like: 'Hunger hurts but starvation works.' 'You have to have control. You have control.' 'Would you rather love yourself or feel guilty in the next half-hour?'
I feel as if my temptation with food is slowly starting to disappear. I know that the day I go 24 hours or more without eating, will happen self-consciencely. Without much effort. The saying 'Nourish the mind now, not the body' has been playing in my head as well. I'll see how this will go. I'm letting go of my stress towards my weight. As long as I remind myself that you don't need to eat 3 meals a day. Eating 1 meal a day will help keep you mind operate. I've lost 1 pound today as well. The scale said 122 lbs. I believe that if I keep up this thought process and mindset, then the weight will fall off. I notice a change in my body. My face, neck, torso, arms, back, stomach and legs look slimmer and more toned. At my current weight, I look healthy. I believe that when I drop beyond the 120's and hit my goal of 115, I will start to look...haha, fat-free. I need to stop focusing on my weight. I believe that is step 1. I think my focus now is building a stronger connection with my mind that helps me fight temptation. Temptation towards food, sex, men or anything that my body can go weak for. I want my mind and my spirit to grow stronger and make me a better person. As long as I can conquer my weaknesses and temptation, than I can accomplish any goal I strive for.

I just woke up like 2.5 hours ago, and I gotta go back to bed at 4:50pm. To catch another nap for my energy to workout from 6:50-7:50pm. Get myself ready for work, and be out the house by 8:30 in order to be on time at 9:00pm. Nuts. Well, I binged and purged yesterday. Luckily, I did not gain any weight. I exercised a tiny bit. Maybe that helped. Today, I've eaten a small dose of broccoli. Not much to say in the journal today, cuz I've only gotten a few hours to myself. That's what I get for staying up all night.

(yawn)
Uuhhh! Haven't eaten since 7pm last night. 21hours ago. I was suppose to eat the damn diet dinner yesterday, but didn't feel like preparing it. I've lost 4 pounds since Thanksgiving. Hopefully, I can shed some more weight today. I can really notice a difference in my body since last week. Since November 16th, I have lost 12 pounds. My butt and thighs looked so small in my jeans yesterday. I can tell my co-workers notice. Ugly bastards! Ah well, it's late in the afternoon, and i still haven't eaten anything. My stomach is growling. Maybe I can catch up to the stupid diet. I'm suppose to be on day 3 right now, but i didn't eat day 2 dinner. I'll eat that now...wait six hours and eat day 3 food 3.5 hours apart. By this time tomorrow, I should have finished everything. Aaahhh!!! I know I'm not gonna lose much weight now!! To much to eat in a 24 hour process. (moan)

Hi everyone!
Today I'm on day 2 of 'the 3 day diet'. I've lost 2 pounds so far for day 1. I'm looking forward to losing another 2 pounds today. I think by Monday, I'll probubly drop 6-7 pounds. I've only eaten one meal so far today, and after this entry I'm probubly gonna take a nap and get ready for work. For breakfast, I've had a hard-boiled egg, toast and half a banana. I think I'll be eating 5 saltine crakers and cottage cheese before I hit the door. I'm also using dexatrin natural diet pills to help boost up my metabolism. (of course, along with exercise) If anyone can recommend me to some really effective diet pills, then that would be a big help. Alright, chat with ya'll later!

I gotta get some sleep. Take a quick cat nap, exercise and get ready for work. I hate my job. I swear I work with most idiotic group of apes out there. They better not say anything to me today. (like they really know how to keep their mouth's shut) Ah well. I hope everyone enjoys they're day today. I've spent plenty of time working on my profile and journal, along with joining a nice amount of interesting communities. Chat with you later.

So what's the difference between a journal entry and a blog? Ok, post an entry... an entry to what? I already put up a bio. Ah well, I am new to this website. I just got my account yesterday, and I've started customized my journal and all that. I've joined 2 communities so far. I have made 3 friends in the last couple hours, and I look forward to making many, many more. One of my goals is just to get the chance and privilege to meet new and exciting people. I am a 20 year old female. I live in Philadelphia, Pennsylvania (USA). My birthday is January 31st. I'm soon to be 21. My zodiac is Aquarius.  My interests are reading, writing, singing, dancing, playing and having fun.